Birth and Fear
Pregnancy and birth are so close to my heart I could talk about it all day. Hence the reason I am a doula! I love all things birth. More than anything I want women to know that fear of birth doesn’t have to be something you face. I believe you can go into birth confidently and peacefully. Let’s start by looking at 4 reasons why there may be fear in birth.
Why Fear?
Let me begin by saying that fear is NOT of God. The Word tells us:
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7
Fear does not produce peace or a sound mind. Usually a stronghold has been built surrounding the thing you fear before you even have have to face it. Where can fear of birth stem from?
1. Lack of Information
A lot of women lack information when it comes to birth. When I had my first baby I relied on a book I thought would help me because as an immigrant, I didn’t have a doctor until I was 6 months pregnant. I had to figure everything out for myself. My book of choice is now a book I would steer people away from. Rather than giving me peace it produced fear and was quite medical. This lack of information caused me to be afraid. Why? Because when I finally went into labour I had no idea what my body was doing and I wondered if what I was experiencing was normal. Things can quickly spiral out of control with lack of knowledge.
“My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.” Hosea 4:6 (first sentence)
2. Wrong Information
Not only can lack of information cause fear, but so can wrong information. Let me start by saying Dr. Google is NOT your friend. Get your information from reliable sources. Ask God to lead you to those sources. Not all Doctors are created equal either and you have choices! Those choices can affect your birth experience as can wrong information! Unfortunately mainstream books, tv shows and media may not always be the best sources of information. Don’t forget these sources usually want you to buy into their ideas, and a lot of the time you can end up with a birth with multiple interventions, which in the end may cause fear!
3. Trauma
Now as much as you may not remember anything about when you were born, you might have heard the story of your birth, or a negative experience during your birth may have affected you without you realizing it.
If you have already given birth before, fear can stem from you having had a bad birth experience already. Your previous experience may even relate to my first points- lack of or wrong information. If you were not informed about some things it can lead to unpleasant experiences.
4. Not Trusting God
Remember that “Perfect love casts out fear.” The word of God tells us to “Fear not” continually! Why? Because God is God! God loves us and will take care of us. We hear it and read it but do we believe it?
Fear gripped me in my first birth and as much as I believed in God, I didn’t trust in His Word the way I should have. My second birth was better because I had more information, however I still didn’t fully trust God’s Word. My third birth led me to the road of discovery I am on now, when I learned to lean on the Word and know that God has a plan for my life and absolutely nothing will change that plan when I put my trust in Him.
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11
Remember: “…we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”
“Have I not commanded you be strong and of good courage, do not be afraid, nor be dismayed for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
Put your full trust in God and see where it leads you!
What things do you fear when it comes to birth or how have you faced and dealt with fear? Let me know in the comments below!
Look out for my second post as I give you ideas of how to deal with fear in birth.
